Tuesday, 12 July 2011

If You REALLY Want Something, It Will Happen. With a LOT of Work!

Family in 2006
With the insertion of the third child, the eyebrows started going up and while on maternity leave, I tried to figure out what I was going to do. Working full time and paying daycare for 3 kids didn’t make sense. I had to work from home and take care of the kids AT THE SAME TIME! Just like in those ads that we see, it was a perfect idea in theory.  This is where the 1950’s, stay at home mom mindset started burrowing it’s way into my brain.

I borrowed a bunch of money from the line of credit and started my own business selling something new and slightly higher end than Avon, called Arbonne. Quality stuff but there is really a great selection of Quality Stuff out there. I really tried to sell it, I had Arbonne parties, I had a display table at the local fair, I made beautiful full coloured fliers. And for how long can we kick a dead horse? I kicked for about 6 months and my maternity leave quickly drew to a close. I did a little accounting and HR work for my husband for a small paycheque.

As a lot of businesses did back then, my Husbands little piece of heaven closed up due to lack of funding. We panicked and then buckled down and did what we had to to pay the rent. Just like in the good ol' 50's. Mike installed cable and job hunted and I worked at a call center from 4 pm to 1 am. It was Christmas time too, that was a tough one to say the least.

In a few months my husband landed a Sweet Job and I was able to quit the call center and worked instead part-time at the post office. Thank goodness we lived near family, I enlisted my mom and niece to watch the kids for the hour that Mike and I were both at work.

The summer after we had almost lost everything Genius Husband decided that we needed a house. I thought he was flat out CRAZY. We had barely survived just months ago at a rented apartment! A house is a MUCH bigger commitment (I think I hesitated about the decision for children much less than I did for the house decision). Well, he pointed out why it was a good decision (he has always put a lot of thought into these ideas and I'm sure he gets annoyed when he has to spell it out for me, which is often), and we were off to 'Try' for a mortgage. Shockingly, we had weathered the storm with good credit and we were approved.

About 2 days before my 30th birthday, we took possession of the house. I was there! Married, with kids, a white picket fence and a Sheltie dog (she was smarter than Littlest Hobo). How did THAT happen?! The Love of my Life celebrated our house and my 30th with a Surprise Party, 'My Little Pony' cake and everything

Sure, we were scraping by with much less money than when we lived away and both worked full time, but suddenly my career wasn't my primary focus. I think it was an Oprah show about balance or something that helped me recognize my priorities. Our parents and grandparents fought for equality in the workplace and fair representation. But I wanted my kids to have ME, I wanted their memories to include our day trips. They may not be to far away, exotic places, but I can go to their fun fairs and choir practices and wave at them from the audience. 

I certainly DO NOT frown upon women that chose to work full time and have kids. Some of us would like to stay home but just cannot afford to. I really do consider myself blessed to be able to do this. And my first two kids spent a lot of their formative years in daycare. 

UGH! I'm wandering again! In my story I'm actually still working! I've gotten ahead of myself! Something very important has happened to us in the past couple of years....


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